Here’s Why Women Love The Missionary Position
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Here’s Why Women Love The Missionary Position

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Lakshmi Devan
3 min read

Here’s Why Women Love The Missionary Position

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You’ll be surprised how many women will love point number 4, and men will be thankful for number 6!

I wonder who gave the missionary position a bad name. Who declared it plain, dull, and boring…and why?

Presumably because it has been one of the most commonly known positions – suggested, tried, tested, even recommended; since before the advent of porn, which brought along with it – doggy style, cowgirl, reverse cowgirl, speedbump, spider, spoons, mantrap, and so many other miscellaneous tricks from the Kamasutra.

I imagine (well, not literally) our grandparents, great-grandparents, and great-great-grandparents did it missionary style, because they knew no better...or maybe they figured out more ‘fun’ things that never left the bedroom. Back then, nobody really discussed sex over chai and samosas at a cousin’s wedding. Maybe even Adam and Eve did it in the same position (but I guess we’ll never know).

It’s true that missionary sex is believed to typically involve sex without elements of BDSM, kink, or fetishism, but who said that the missionary position cannot involve any of it?

missionary sex

Problem is, somewhere along the way, we’ve confused missionary sex with the missionary position, and given everything missionary a bad name. The term missionary sex implies ‘vanilla’ or ‘unadventurous’ sex; whereas the missionary position is merely an innocuous man-on-top position, in which a woman lies on her back, and a man lies on top of her while they face each other, and engage in penetration. And believe me, it isn’t half bad.

men making love to the women

At a birthday dinner discussion, 7 out of 8 of my girlfriends placed missionary in their top 3 favourite positions, and it got me thinking. Whoever started this missionary-shaming could positively not have owned ovaries, y’all. Nah uh.

I’ve been asking around since, and here’s why (a) women seem to love missionary, and (b) it should receive the respect long due to it:

  • Most women find this a very romantic position, because the two partners face each other. They can maintain eye contact, kiss passionately, whisper little nothings in each other’s ears, watch each other squirm in pleasure, and feel each other’s warmth.
  • The discomfort of first-time penetration is usually related to tension in the pelvic or thigh muscles, which are more relaxed if, initially, the missionary position is chosen. Arrange a couple of pillows under the woman's bottom, so her hips are tilted upwards.
  • It’s the simplest, most understood of all positions, so the chances of getting it wrong are low. Especially beneficial for first-timers!
  • This position can give the woman plenty of clitoral stimulation if the man is leaning forward, thus rubbing his pelvic bone against her clitoris. In addition, this position is one of the easiest ones for a woman to stimulate her clitoris manually. She can also grab the man’s hips or his lower back to choreograph the thrusts.
  • There are so many ways to do it, and so many positions to easily transition to. The woman can lift her legs in the air at varying angles; she can entwine them around the man’s hips; she can push her hips all the way up towards him for deeper penetration, or push them down to have shallower thrusts. And all of these transitions are easy to do without being a contortionist.
  • Missionary has the lowest risk of penile fractures, since the man is primarily in control.
  • Every woman’s go-to position for when they’re feeling lazy. She can just lie back and enjoy, while the man does most of the work.
  • This point is straight from men – they like missionary because it gives them a good view of their partner lying in all their naked glory, moving and moaning in pleasure, which is instant gratification, and a boost to the ego.

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